A Different Life
by psychadelic
Summary: "I guess I'll see you around Detective" he said...   And Becket felt the air woosh out of her lungs as though some one had punched her in the gut...
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** All part of ABC and well whoever owns it.

**A/N: **This is set some time in the future after the events of Knockdown, as you will see. There are no spoilers, only if you haven't already seen Knockdown. All mistakes belong to me as this hasn't been beta-ed yet.

* * *

**A Different Life**

It had been six weeks. Six long fucking weeks since she had actually laid eyes on him. Six long weeks since she had heard his voice. Six excruciating weeks since she had felt the safety of his arms and the thrill of his kiss. It had also been six trying weeks of her attempting to stick to her self-imposed rule of not seeking him out, and making him come to her. She had almost made it too, it of weren't for the little punk seated at the end of the bar counter, currently having his wrist examined by Lanie, to see if any damage had been done to it, courtesy of Kate. From what the detective saw, there had been no damage, but one could never be sure and she didn't need a damn law suit to add to her already growing list of problems.

Castle had conveniently stopped coming to the precinct after the Raglan case, with the excuse that Gina was after his blood for not handing in the latest chapter of his book, and because she wanted him to go on tour to promote the 'Nikki Heat' movie that was due out in a couple of days. While his book sales were doing exceptionally well, Gina had forced him to do the tour, stating that people would fork out more for the movie and book if he made a special live guest appearance. It turned out though, that the blonde woman didn't need to put in the extra effort she usually did to convince him, he was more than willing to get as far away from New York as he could, as fast as was humanly possible. He was ready to take a break from shadowing the famous 'Detective Nikki Heat' for a short while just to clear his head.

The trip however, had proven to be anything but a source of distraction for the best-selling author. At every corner he turned, he was met with promotional posters advertising the Nikki Heat movie. Whether it was on billboards, or at bus stands, even on windows of movie rental shops, there was no way he could escape her and it only prompted him to think about her even more. By the end of the fifth week, Castle decided that he had, had enough and he was ready to go home, back to New York, back to his mother and daughter.

He knew he should have told her he was back as soon as he got home, but he was not sure he could deal with her rejection yet again. This had happened once before, and while the previous time he had made the mistake of not keeping in touch with any of the team members, this time he had taken the effort of texting either Ryan or Esposito asking them how it was going and keeping the it general. He had never once inquired specifically about Kate though he knew the boys would understand that him keeping in touch with them had everything to do with their team leader.

Castle simply did not want history to repeat itself, and seeing as he had received no word from Ryan or Esposito that she had broken up with her Mr Perfect, Doctor-By-Day, Biker-by-Night boyfriend, Josh he decided to keep his distance from the female detective. Well it was not as though he had informed Kate about his break-up with Gina either…

0 o 0 o 0

The team had caught a case, and while they were closing in on the suspect, Beckett knew that they would have figured it out a lot sooner if Castle were still with her – them. Sure he was annoying and frustrating and childish at times – a nine year old child on a sugar rush trapped in a man's body, but he was also surprisingly observant and meticulous, wanting to get the details correct and knowing the questions to ask to get the brain flowing again. After what seemed like an eternity, but was only a week and a half, they solved the case and brought the perp in. Ryan was the one who suggested they go to 'The Haunt' for drinks – to decompress.

Beckett had almost declined the invite, but the look on her best friend Lanie's face immediately swayed her decision, and besides, she thought to herself, Castle was still on his book / movie tour and he would only be returning in a week's time – not that she was counting. There was no chance of bumping into him and she found that she was okay with that.

At ten pm on a weeknight, The Haunt was surprisingly busy, Beckett noted. She also saw that she recognised a lot more faces than she thought she would have. The Haunt, it seemed had become a cop bar, with many of them from the twelfth coming here to unwind and decompress before going home to their families. It almost seemed like a second home to her. She seated herself on a bar stool at the end of the wooden counter and waited as her three friends did the same. An hour or so passed with them talking about nothing in general, Lanie and Esposito still trying to hide the fact that they were dating, and Beckett and Ryan laughing because they already knew.

The rest of them were already on their third beers while Beckett was still nursing her first, not being in the mood to drink that evening, when she felt the change in the atmosphere. It was not something anyone would have picked up on even had they been paying attention, but the detective had long ago grown accustomed and very aware to his presence. She could pick out his footfalls out of thousands, and she knew, without a doubt, that he had just entered the bar.

Ryan was the first to spot him standing in the doorway, and waved him over as soon as the author looked in their direction. Beckett had kept her gaze settled on her drink, forcing herself not to look up at him. She wanted him to work for a reaction from her, for her attention. To say that she was mad at him or even upset was the understatement of the damn century. She listened though, as Castle and the rest of the group exchanged tales about the past few weeks that he had been gone. Well mostly Ryan and Esposito listened while Lanie and Castle talked. It did not escape her attention that he did not, even once, try to include her in any part of the conversation, and while she wanted it that way, she had to admit his unusual behaviour unnerved her somewhat. Finally when she could no longer handle it, she excused herself and made her way to the bathrooms on the other side of the room, and then she intended to leave this damn place.

Beckett was so lost in her own thoughts that she did not notice Castle had followed her down the corridor that led to the bathroom. It was only when she felt a hand on her shoulder and she turned to face him did she realise he had been two steps behind her all this while. She saw a glimmer of movement behind her, and all her senses clicked into place. She was a cop first, and her immediate reaction was to pull him out of the way and then deal with the damn perp who was trying to get at Castle. It had all happened in the blink of any eye, and the next thing she realised was that she had cuffed the kid who had tried to get an autograph from the duo and that she was pressed flush up against Castle who had reversed their positions so that his larger body was now covering hers from any danger that might still be lurking.

It didn't matter that the kid had not protested her cuffing him, using more force than was necessary to do so. All she could think of was that he was in danger and that she had to protect him, after failing him on two occasions. The triple killer case still haunted her, and she knew she was one of the lucky ones because he had let Castle go. He could have killed him, and Beckett would have never known. And with the Raglan case, Castle could have easily been the sniper's target instead of the cop….

"Hey, I was only tyring to get an autograph," the kid said and it was only then that Beckett realised it was just a kid, maybe eighteen or nineteen the oldest.

"Next time, just ask," she shot back, the adrenaline still pumping and her fears still at the front of her mind.

She gave Castle a proper once over, making sure he had not been injured before putting a little distance between them. It was increasingly difficult for her to think while he was so damn close to her. It seemed he had other thoughts though, and he leaned down to place a soft kiss on her temple before straightening up and allowing her to move away from him.

"Come on Becks, let the kid go. There was no harm done," Castle said once he had regained himself, but with the glare he got from the female detective he knew it was totally the wrong thing to say.

Ryan and Esposito, having heard the slight commotion appeared a few minutes later, the latter's eyebrow raised in question.

"Problem?" Ryan asked and before Beckett could reply, Castle shook his head, indicating there was none.

"Just a really, really persistent fan wanting an autograph," Castle smiled at the two male detectives, who seemed to accept the explanation, before Ryan un-cuffed the kid and Esposito ordered him to ask the woman seated at the end of the bar to check his wrist out. When the pair was sure there was no other danger to Castle and Beckett, they made their way back to the table, leaving the two alone once again.

An uncomfortable silence settled between the partners, and neither of them knew what to do. It was Castle who finally broke it.

"Beckett," he called her and waited for a response but she gave him none.

"Kate," he tried again, but was met with the same reaction.

"Katie…" he whispered and this time Beckett felt all the anger and annoyance melt with the simple name he used to call her. However, she maintained her stoic expression, not wanting him to see just how much he affected her.

"I…I.." he started but stopped and heaved in a deep breath.

"Katie these past few weeks…" he started again, but was cut midway when he another voice calling out for Beckett.

The pair turned their attention to the entrance of the corridor, and Castle heaved in another deep breath without even realising it, when he saw Josh. It didn't escape his attention that Beckett was just as surprised to see Mr Perfect Biker Boy Boyfriend standing in the corridor, as he was.

Beckett watched as Castle composed himself before he took the first step forward, toward her, and then another and then another, until he was right in front of her. She knew he was waiting for her to make the first move, take that first step, but she simply stood there, looking at him, her face betraying none of the emotion that were running wild in her heart and head.

And finally…

He made the move.

"I guess I'll see you around, Detective Beckett," he greeted her.

Beckett felt the air whoosh out of her lungs as though she had been punched in the gut, and she found that no matter how hard she tried, she just couldn't breathe for a few minutes. She watched as he closed the distance between them and placed a soft, gentle, platonic kiss on the corner of her mouth…

And then he was gone.

By the time her brain had process what had just transpired, Castle was long gone, and she now she stood facing Josh.

"You ready to go?" he asked her and she could only nod her head dumbly.

_God Castle… I wish things were different! _She thought to herself and she watched the buildings pass by in the familiar route to Josh's apartment.

* * *

Hope you guys liked it. The next chapter will be up as soon as I am done writing it.  
And yes I do mean on paper with a pen or pencil LOL  
Let me know what you think and if I should continue this or not.  
Thanks…


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer:** All part of ABC and well whoever owns it.

**A/N: **This is set some time in the future after the events of Knockdown, as you will see. There are no spoilers, only if you haven't already seen Knockdown. All mistakes belong to me as this hasn't been beta-ed yet.

* * *

**Chapter II**

Kate was seated at her desk completing the last of her reports when the alarm clock on her phone alerted her that it was long past home time. It had been a long and stressful day, and Captain Montgomery had ordered her to leave the precinct hours ago, but she had insisted on finishing the paperwork and closing the case before she took off. That was the excuse she had given him, but the truth was, even if she had left early to go home, there was nothing or no one waiting for her. No one keeping the fires burning. Sure her eccentric and very loyal band of friends would be available if she called, but Kate knew what it was like to get precious time off from the job and spend it with loved ones. It was a rare occurrence and she really didn't want to intrude on that time. Besides, Lanie, Esposito and Ryan had lives of their own when not on the job, and despite the Detective being happy for them, she was also slightly jealous that they did not allow the job to take over their lives as she did.

The Detective rubbed a hand down her face and pinched the bridge of her nose, in an attempt to keep the headache, she knew was about to make an appearance, at bay. She wanted to go home, have a nice long bath, a warm meal that was not simply take away or ready made, someone to share that meal with and then talk about the crappy days she had and then have them make love to her until every situation was erased from her mind. She was exhausted, frustrated, annoyed, but mostly she was angry. Angry at herself for allowing her guard to fall, allowing the one man she didn't want to creep through the cracks in the walls she had built around her heart. She was also angry at him for being the man he was, sure he had irritated and annoyed her at first, but now he had become a major part of her life, and while she would never admit it aloud, she couldn't imagine her life without him…

She was so lost in thought, she had not heard the sound of the elevator ping and the doors swishing open on the third floor and two minutes later Kate heard the voice she had not heard for three weeks straight.

"Kate," he greeted and a startled Kate tilted her head to look up at him.

His beard had grown in the last three weeks, despite him loving the clean shaven look and he was in definite need of a haircut, but otherwise he looked good.

"Hi," she whispered back, not sure what else to say to him. She hadn't been expecting him to come over to the precinct and she had not missed the disappointed expression on his face at her one word greeting.

"You know, some women jump for joy when their boyfriends return home after being away for so long" he said after a short silence.

"It's been a long day, and I'm tired," she said as a way of an explanation.

"Should I take that as my cue to leave then?" he asked and Kate simply gave him a blank look. She really was not in the mood to explain her reason for not jumping him as soon as she knew he had returned.

"Josh -" she said in a warning tone and it was enough for the doctor to stop himself from saying whatever it was that was about to roll off his tongue.

"Kate its almost ten, surely the paperwork will still be here in the morning, and frankly I am quite hungry. Lets grab some dinner and then we can go home," he offered.

The Detective was about to reject the offer, but she found that she really didn't want to spend the evening alone, so she stood up from her seated position, grabbed her coat off the back of her chair and hooked her handbag over her shoulder before walking out the bullpen with Josh.

0 o 0 o 0

Dinner had been casual and Kate had listened with half an ear as Josh relayed stories about his stay and work in Africa. It was not that she didn't appreciate what he was doing, but she didn't like that he was gone for weeks on end. She in turn had told him about some of the cases, making sure that she had left out the part where she and Castle had shared a passionate kiss, or the events of this morning. No there were still things she could not share with him, despite being with him for the better part of eight months now. And the topic of one Richard Castle was definitely off limits.

"Kate… Kate..." she heard him call out to her and finally focused on him once again. He had scooted closer to her on the couch and his hand was curled around her waist, drawing her to him. She could feel the impending doom, but there was nothing she could do to stop it.

"You seem distracted," he whispered as he drew his face nearer to hers.

"It's been a long day, Josh."

"Then let me make you forget all about it," he said as he finally closed the distance between them.

Kate stiffened as soon as she felt his lips on hers, and she knew she had to put in all the effort she could summon, to respond to his kiss. She felt as his hand found their way to her waist, as they untucked her shirt from her pants and then as they settled on her cool skin, pulling her lower body closer to his. She found that no matter how hard she tried, even the feel of his hands making their way up her waist and hips to her ribcage had no effect on her, and she knew the reason… Before he could go any further with both his hands and kissing her, Kate pulled herself away from him.

"I'm sorry. I can't do this. Not right now," was the only explanation she offered him before she retrieved her stuff and bolted out of his apartment, leaving the doctor shocked at her behaviour.

0 o 0 o 0

She found herself standing outside Castle's door an hour and a half later. She had fully intended going back to her apartment, cracking open a bottle of Johnny Walker and drowning her day in that, but her thoughts had then moved on to Castle and before she knew it she was in his building, on his floor, about to knock on his door. There was silence on the other side and she raised her hand to knock on the wooden door. It was only two minutes later she realised that either Martha or Alexis could answer the door and she had not come up with an explanation for them, telling them why she was standing outside their apartment at two in the morning.

Her fear was put to rest however, when Castle himself answered the door, his hair dishevelled as though he had continuously been running his hands through it, his eyes clear, though tired as though he hadn't slept in weeks.

"Detective Beckett," he greeted her, his tone clipped, "What official business brings you by?" he asked when she didn't say anything.

The mere sight of him was enough to unravel the detective and it took her a minute or few to get her bearings back.

"Could I come in?" she asked and Castle stepped aside to allow her in.

"How are you doing?" her whispered voice was loud in the quiet loft.

"Is that really what you came to ask me at two in the morning?" he sounded amused. "You could have just called and asked," he said.

"You were avoiding me."

'No I've been busy with the last few chapters of the Nikki Heat novel," his excuse was a poor one and they both knew it, and all it did was incite the anger she was feeling toward him earlier, that evening, again.

"You haven't come in to the precinct for three weeks Castle, you don't call, you don't text, you don't instant message – _that's you avoiding me" _she had him there but he would not let her see it.

"Despite what you may think _Detective _my world does _not _revolve around you. Yes I needed to do research and now that I have at least ten books worth of it, I won't be shadowing you anymore," he shot back. "I won't be in your hair and challenging your authority in front of suspects or pulling your pigtails. I'm done," he clarified, just in case she didn't believe him the first time.

And that was all it took before she started again. Thankfully neither Martha nor Alexis was home to witness this.

"_I almost died today Castle, did you know that?" _she stepped up closer to him and from where he stood he could see the bruise on her chest, just above her left breast.

He knew of the days events, after Ryan had called and told him what had gone down at the abandoned warehouse and he had wanted to call her so badly, but the memory of her choosing Josh over him kept making its way into his mind and so he simply threw his phone to the other end of the room and started working on a new book altogether.

"_I almost died and do you know what my thoughts were Castle?" _she asked him her eyes pinning his.

"No."

"_I was thinking that out of all the people that were there, the one who matters to me most wasn't. And I had no idea if he knew how much danger I was in. I didn't even know if he thought about me in these last three weeks. Lanie, Ryan and Esposito, they were all there, but the only person I wanted was you… and you…_

_You weren't there Castle!_

_You weren't there!"_

She poked his chest with her forefinger as she moved closer toward him and the next thing she knew was that she was enclosed in his arms and he was kissing her with all he had. His lips melded to hers kissing the life out of her... _or rather into her _she thought as she felt her body come alive with his touch.

His kiss was just as she had remembered it would be, soft and gentle yet demanding at the same time. The feel of his cool hands on her waist set her alight and within minutes she had pulled his T-shirt over his head. His hands trailed up her sides, to her ribcage and she felt the pads of his thumbs against her breasts. She deepened the kiss, pulling his body flush against hers, and she could feel his need for her in the way he touched her.

"Kate," she heard him mumble when he pulled away long enough to draw a breath and clear his thoughts somewhat.

"_Bedroom," _she ordered.

"We shouldn't be doing this," he said.

"You're upset and angry and you're going to regret this in the morning."

This time she pulled away from him, but only long enough to make something very clear to him.

"_I almost died today Castle, and all I wanted was for you to be with me. For me to know you were safe. And if I did die today, the only thing I would regret was not doing this… _

_Not making love to you."_

The statement hit him square in the chest and he felt all the air whoosh out of his lungs. Still he was not convinced that this was what she wanted, and Kate saw that when she saw the expression on his face.

She turned his face so that he was looking straight at her, her eyes pinning his.

"_I want you to make love to me Richard Alexander Castle._

_And I want you to do it tonight,"_

* * *

Hope you guys liked it. The next chapter will be up as soon as I am done writing it.

And yes I do mean on paper with a pen or pencil LOL

Also major twist in next chapter… if I ever get to writing it.

It depends on whether you want me to continue or not. Let me know with a review.

Please

Pretty please…

Thanks…


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: **See chapter 1

**A/N: **So I started this chapter a while ago and I wanted to post it before Setup/Countdown but I just could not get it down right. So after very many redo's and starting from scratch moments I managed to come up with this. Hope you guys enjoy it. Also this chapter was extremely difficult for me to write, especially the 'mature' parts, which I don't usually do, but I had to for this story. Well that's all for now. Read and enjoy :)

* * *

**Chapter III**

Richard Castle felt his entire world come to a halt with the words that had tumbled off her lips. He had thought, dreamed even fantasised about this moment over a million times in the last four years, but never in his wildest imagination did he ever think it would be in a situation as the one he was stuck in at that moment. It was not that he didn't want to sleep with her, not at all. In fact he had made no secret of the fact that he was attracted to her and wanted them to move past the 'just friends' stage that they had been stuck in, but he wanted her to do it on her terms, and tonight - well that was definitely _not _on her terms.

"We shouldn't be doing this. You're still seeing Josh," he informed her, but she was not interested in anything he had to say.

"He's not here, and he's not the one I'm standing with right now," she replied.

"Kate," he said, more firmly this time as he stopped her hands from travelling across his naked chest. "You really should go home, take a day to deal with things, and then if you still feel you need or want to do this, then I have no problem with it."

Kate stepped back with such force; one would have thought Castle had physically struck out at her.

Before he knew what had happened she had bolted from his apartment and into the elevator, leaving him standing speechless staring at the open door.

It was only two hours later when Ryan called him to ask if he had heard anything from Beckett that he started to worry. He was not sure if the boys knew she had come to his apartment, and if they didn't, he had no intention of telling them. After a short conversation with both Ryan and Esposito Castle hung up the phone and went out looking for her.

The first place he tried was the precinct, but her empty desk and the clean murder board was enough of a sign to let him know she was not there. Esposito had already confirmed that Kate was not with Lanie and so he tried Remy's next, knowing that was one of the other places she would go to, When he didn't find her there he went The Haunt, hoping she was there, but that proved futile too.

Eventually he decided to go up to her apartment and wait for her. It seemed though that he should have known she would have went home to retreat from the world and try to deal with everything on her own. Using his key, he unlocked the door and entered her apartment, letting himself in. What he did not expect to see, was Detective Katherine Beckett, slouched on her couch, her shoulders rising and falling as she cried silently. He walked over to where she was seated and settled down next to her then pulled her into him, her face against his chest, offering all the comfort and support he could…

0 o 0 o 0

It was the feel of her fingers running up and down the length of his chest that slowly roused him from the deep sleep he didn't realise he had fallen into. He opened his eyes slowly, his brain taking in his surroundings as he did so. The sight of a bottle of Johnny Walker and two glasses on the wooden coffee table alerted him that he was clearly not in his own apartment and before he could voice the question of just where the hell he was, he heard her voice…

There was no way in hell he would ever mistake her voice. It had been ingrained into his mind since almost four years ago when he had started following her around, calling her his muse and lead character for his new series of novels. He tried to turn his head so he could see where she was seated, and for some reason he was not surprised that she was lying next to him on the sofa-bed that was clearly too small for the both of them at the same time. Well he should have figured that out when he felt her body pressed flush against his.

"How long have I been out?" he asked.

"About an hour or so," she replied, still stroking his chest absently, unaware of the stir of emotion and reactions her simple actions were creating in his body.

"Could you please stop doing that?" he was trying with all he had to keep his voice steady, to not show her just how much he was affecting her.

"Doing what?" she asked him, clearly confused as to what he was asking her to stop doing.

Castle didn't trust himself to keep his voice free of emotion and so he did the next best thing, he tried to stop her hand, but found that he could not move his arm. The reason for this was it was curled around Kate's lithe body, pressing her into him and it was clear she was in no rush to allow him to let go of her.

He was about to start talking again stopped when he felt her hand creep up his chest, this time under his T-shirt, her cool hands slithering against his warm skin. His chest rose and fell rapidly with his erratic breathing and he felt himself stiffening at her ministrations.

"You mean, doing this?" she said as she gently though erotically pinched his nipple and then swiped her thumb over it to soothe it.

"Beckett" his voice was more strained then ever, and he noticed that it only prompted her further.

"Castle," he heard her whisper into his ear before licking the outer rim of his ear and biting softly on his earlobe, and he felt all the blood rush to his groin.

"We shouldn't be…" he started but she cut him off again, this time fusing her mouth to his, harder than she had initially intended. One hand cupped the back of his head and pulled his mouth closer to hers while the other skated down his torso and into his boxers, causing him to groan in reply. The button and fly of his pants were easily dealt with and soon enough Castle felt the cool air hit his throbbing manhood when Kate pushed his boxers and pants down to his ankles.

"_I want you Castle,"_ the words looped in his brain and he found that even though he knew this was wrong on so many levels, there was just no way he could deny her something she was telling him that only he could give her.

He tasted the scotch on her lips and wondered just how much she had to drink, and whether this was really her or the alcohol talking. So far she seemed way too rational to be drunk, and with the way she was touching him, he doubted she was even slightly tipsy.

"If you're worried about how much I had to drink, I can assure you I am not nearly drunk enough to _not _remember this in the morning," she said as though she were reading his thoughts.

Castle stilled her hands on his body, garnering her attention as best he could and waited until she locked eyes with his.

"If we do this then we do it my way, or we don't do it at all!" he said, surprised at himself at how sure he sounded, "and if you don't agree then…" he left the rest of the sentence hanging, letting her fill in the words.

It seemed, though, that Kate had no intention on letting him take control. She peeled off her shirt and camisole, as well as discarded her jeans and underwear leaving her naked.

"_I almost died today. And now I want to feel alive. And the only time I feel alive is when I am with you. _

_You Castle. _

_I want you to make me feel alive… _

_Right here…_

_Right now…"_

Castle felt as she settled her lithe body on top of his, aligning herself to him, and felt the tip of his now fully erect penis at her entrance. But there was something nagging at the back of his mind, something stopping him from entering her right then. Sure he had wanted to make love to her since forever, but not this way. Not when all she wanted was a distraction.

He waited for her to make the first move, and she did so by stroking his chest before he melded their mouths together in a soul searing kiss. His hands traced their way to her breasts, one cupping the soft, delicate flesh and moulding it gently before tweaking the nipple until it hardened to his touch. The other hand travelled lower until he felt her core, which by touch he knew was not lubricated enough for him to enter her.

He pumped his fingers gently in and out of her, watching as her face displayed the emotions that were overtaking her. When stopped reacting to just his one finger Castle inserted a second and this time Kate let out an audible gasp as she felt the new pressure building inside of her. She lifted her hips in time to his finger thrusts and soon enough he could feel her inner walls quivering around his fingers. With the knowledge that she was so close to coming, Castle latched his mouth to hers and kissed her as he pinched her clit with one hand and pumped her furiously with the other, waiting for her to shout his name as she fell into oblivion. It didn't take her long and Castle felt her muscles contracting against his fingers as she came hard around him. He kept his fingers inside of her as she rode out her orgasm, his thumb flicking her clit, producing small quakes within her.

When she had finally got her breathing under control, and she regained a bit of strength, Kate rolled on top of him, aligned her body to his, and ground her pelvis against his. Kate sat up and straddled him, pushing her hips against his and Castle let out a hiss at the friction. She ran her finger up the underside of his shaft, and watched as his breath hitched in his throat, and she curled her small fist around him, pumping slowly, with enough pressure to keep him on edge, but not to get him off.

Castle felt the pre come squirt out and Kate coated the rest of his length with it as she stroked him. He was now ready to enter her, and even though she was more than ready and willing Castle still needed to hear it from her lips. He wanted her to know she still had a choice, that they could still stop if she wanted to, but her next ten words decided it for him.

"_Castle… _

_I want to feel you come, _

_Inside me"_

And that was all the confirmation he needed.

He ran two fingers along her slit just to make sure she was ready and lubricated enough, before he aligned the head of his throbbing penis to her entrance. Castle then flipped them over so he was lying on top of her, and he entered her in two powerful strokes and then stilled completely, as he allowed her to adjust to him. The feel of her walls against his flesh felt like nothing he had ever felt before in his life, and she was tight, as though she hadn't had a sexual partner in years. He felt her start moving under him and provoked him to start thrusting into her. He sealed his mouth to hers swallowing every moan and pleased sound that she made.

Their mouths mimicked their lower body actions and soon enough there was a thin film of sweat coating their bodies. Castle felt her trembling against him and he knew she was close. He thrust into her twice more and that was all it took for her to shatter in his arms, whispering his name as she did so. She clenched him so tightly Castle felt his orgasm hit him with a force he never knew possible and he felt his seed spill out into her.

It was only when he had regained his bearings and could think clearly that an important thought made it's presence in his mind.

"_Oh God, what about the condom?" he thought to himself._

There was not much time to think about it though because he fell asleep soon after, pulling Kate closer to him and covering them with the blanket she usually left on the back of the sofa.

"_I love you" _he heard her say though he was not sure if she was awake or already asleep.

0 o 0 o 0

The sound of the shower woke him and Castle was not surprised to see that Kate had already cleared up the proof of what had transpired between them the night before. She was still in the shower when her land line began to ring. Castle debated on whether to answer or not, but the sound of Josh's voice leaving a message stopped him from picking up the handset.

"_Kate, its Josh. I don't know what happened last night, but I'm on my way over. See you in ten. Love you." _

He didn't know what to do. Did he erase the message and make as though Josh never called? Tell her that Josh called but he didn't leave a message? Or simply take his clothes and bolt before she got out of the shower. He was frozen to his spot and he did not realise that the shower had stopped.

The slight noise behind him brought him out of his thoughts and he turned to see Kate looking back at him. The expression on her face was all he needed to see. He picked up his clothes, and got dressed without a word.

"Castle –"she called him but he didn't turn to look at her.

_I really do wish things were different…_ she told him.

Someone should have told her to be careful what she wished for, as she just might get it…

* * *

I really hope you guys like it as I had a lot of trouble writing this chapter.  
Please let me know if you guys think I should continue... or not.

Also for those of you still reading and favouriting Million Dollar Question - Thank you so much

Enjoy  
Don't forget to leave a review on your way out.  
Please?  
Pretty Please?  
:p

Pysch


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